Southern Style with Randall Franks

A little funny never hurts

One of my readers remarked that I needed to share a bit of comedy in my column to raise the spirits of the folks back home. Seems like a good idea and I’m willing to take aim at it.

One of my favorite places to find funny comments or situations is in our local church. Sometimes the funniest thing you find relates to youngin’s and church thinking.

A few years ago my nephew asked me if he had a guardian angel. I told him “Absolutely. You have a guardian angel and the angle is always with you.”

“Does he eat with me?” he asked.

“Sure,” I said.

“Does he sleep with me?”

“Sure,” I said.

“That must have been who kicked me out of bed last night,” he said.

I heard this from an older feller at church, who will remain nameless because his wife wouldn’t be pleased about it.

A member of the congregation asked the pastor if he knew where radio was invented. The pastor replied that he didn’t think he knew where the radio was invented. The parishioner answered that it was invented in The Garden of Eden.

“In the Garden of Eden,” the pastor replied. “How can that be?”

“It’s simple,” the man answered, “God took Adam’s rib out and made the first loudspeaker.”

On the subject of religion, here’s a little known fact about Noah’s Ark that few realize. There were actually three camels on board the ark.

The first one was the camel many people swallow while straining at a gnat. The second one was the camel whose back was broken by the last straw. And the third was the one who shall pass through the eye of a needle before a rich man enters the kingdom of Heaven. I could add Camel cigarettes but that’s taking it a little too far.

Jud and his wife Jeweldine was an unfruitful farm couple that prayed to conceive a child. As an answer to the prayer, the couple received the blessing of triplets.

The preacher, upon his arrival at the hospital, commented as to how their prayers were answered. Jud said, “Yep, but I never prayed for a bumper crop.”

Old maid sister Sarah had searched endlessly to find the love of her life with no success so she finally turned to prayer. Being a conservative person she prayed, “Oh Lord, I am not asking for a thing for myself but please send my mother a son-in-law.”

Laughter has always been an important part of life in our family mainly because of the nature of our ancestors to lean towards being stoic in their approach in life. That approach comes even more naturally to me than laughter does.

I am often asked “Why don’t you smile more.” My answer is sometimes I am smiling on the inside. Moments of joys and laughter are even more cherished to me. May laughter always fill your days because God does have a sense of humor otherwise, he would have never made someone quite like us, would he?

(Randall Franks is an award-winning musician, singer and actor. He is best known for his role as “Officer Randy Goode” on TV’s “In the Heat of the Night” now on WGN America. His latest CD release, “Mississippi Moon,” is by Crimson Records. He is a member of the Independent Country Music Hall of Fame. His latest book is “Encouragers I: Finding the Light.” He is a syndicated columnist for and can be reached at

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